Well, the doc came back, last night, to report that Elvon has a minor fracture of the left distal femur.  That’s the big bone on its way into the knee from above.  It does not require surgery, and it’s his bad leg.  They just immobilized it, with a brace.  He hollered bloody murder.  The good news is that it will take a couple-three days to regulate his pain-killers and that will make his move to Carmel Hills Care Center, a shoe-in. 

Well, that has always been our objective, but what a way to achieve it!

 It will also make it a Medicare matter, which will be easier on our finances.  About time we caught a break.  I hear you groan, but I couldn’t resist it.  If I don’t get a laugh once in a while, I’ll cry.  The break isn’t much, but Elvon doesn’t react well to the hospital environment.  He never has, but now he doesn’t understand why he is here, isn’t sure where he is, and is afraid of, well, everything.   

 You should see this hospital.  It’s much like a resort.  I am most impressed and find it a nice quiet place to spend a few hours.  As long as the medical personnel stay out of the room, it’s calm and serene, unless he has a bad dream.  The cafeteria is good.  There’s a Meditation Room, and lovely gardens.  I’ll have to ask if they have a gym for visitors.  I wouldn’t be surprised.   

To answer the comments that last post garnered.  Yes, there is Memory Care where we live at Fountaingrove Lodge.  It is in a separate building, two minutes walk away, called “The Terraces”.  Elvon has been Number One on its list for over a month, now.  All it will take is for one person not to come back, and he is in.  I expect that will be the case.

Transfers aren’t just difficult.  They range from easy to impossible, to a fight.  He never got out of bed Saturday or Sunday, until Susan arrived to tempt him out.  He is starting to get testy, too.  That’s new, and none too pleasant.  In the care center, he will get the therapy he needs, have a recumbent bike to ride, etc.

We will never be very far from each other.  We will be 10 minutes away, by car, while we are biding our time in Carmel, waiting for Fountaingrove Lodge and the Terraces to re-open.  That should be by February 15.  Then I will move back into our apartment at Fountaingrove Lodge, and Elvon will move into The Terraces, if there is room.  It was full, but, hopefully, someone won’t move back.

We still don’t have the OK to come from Carmel Hills Care Center.  I thought all but all our paperwork was in.  But now they want one more form filled out and our doctor is getting balky.  This needs to happen, as transfers are less and less successful.  Susan’s presence was initially magic.  He popped up for her and we had a lovely rack of lamb dinner.  He even came up with a good bit of conversation.

Monday, nobody could get him to move.  We got one transfer to the chair, but he wouldn’t go anywhere from there.  I interrupted writing this to try to get him to get up for dinner.  Susan was cooking and Kris, his niece, was here, too.  I promised wine, and young women.  No go. They bought him a commode this afternoon.  It was lovely to have the help.

An hour and a half-hour later, Elvon managed to get up for dinner.  Between dinner and dessert, I remembered we had put Sylly P in the bathroom, to get Elvon out the door, because  we were afraid Sylly P would scoot out, and there’s another cat, here.  The bloody bathroom door was locked, and on close examination of the other bathroom doors, we figured out that the cat could easily have locked herself in, in an attempt to get out.

Two hours later, four members of the younger generation had succeeded in breaking in ti the bathroom, and I had the kitchen cleaned up.  It was a good thing, as my research on 24-hour locksmiths had gone south. I disturbed the little crowd around the bathroom door to get Elvon to bed.  And, oh joy, while e was transferring, I heard the sound of a dead bolt moving.  Sylly P was free, and we all had ice cream!

Tuesday morning, I got good news from Carmel Hills Care Center and went out to play with Candy.  Elvon was cleared to move to respite care, tomorrow or the next day.  The Lodge’s Memory care re-opens November 9, if the state approves, and the Lodge itself, on the 13th.  All we needed was official doctor’s orders and they had sent the form to our doc.

Well!  Our doctor decided to have a hissy fit, because it was the fourth time he had been asked for paperwork for Elvon.  He refused to do it.  (!?!)  If he had not taken the week off just after the fire, Elvon would have been admitted to the first place to which they sent paperwork. By the time the doc got in, that place had given its last memory care/skilled nursing bed to another fire evacuee.  That started the massive search, with daughter, Susan, Oakmont personnel, and good friends, Pat and Jo Gibbons, helping me call places all over California, from Carmel to Santa Rosa.  We thought we were all set, but, as of last night, it was by no means sure that he would get the paperwork in for another week, or more.

But, the promise of a glass of wine and a nice dinner tempted him into transferring to his wheelchair again, last night.  We had tortilla chips and pico de gallo, with a glass of wine, and followed it with my Rice Krispie chicken, ridiculously rich mashed potatoes, and sugar snap peas.  For dessert, we had Talenti gelato, and Trader Joe’s Lacey cookies.  It was all delicious, and we went to bed content.

I was awakened at around 12:15am, by a thump and a cry.  He, who has been afraid to transfer to a wheelchair, had got up, used the commode for a walker, and made it in and out of the bathroom, using the floor as the commode. He almost made it back to bed, but he fell.  I knew I could never get him up, so I called 911.   The fire department came, and got him back on to the bed.  He seemed fine, except  for a lithe tear on his left knee.  The firefighters stayed with me, while I got out peroxide, antibiotic and a band-aid.  I thanked them profusely, and Elvon went back to sleep.  I had some clean-up to do, and needed another hour to read myself down, when it was over.  I turned my light off around 3:00 am.

I got up around nine, and checked in with Carmel Hills Care Center.  I was hoping there was a way to bypass his recalcitrant primary care physician.  They were very sympathetic, but, alas, not.  No other doctor will do.  I called the office manager at the doctor’s office back, and she had better news.  The doc had had a change of heart.  He may have deduced he was the problem.  He had such a full schedule today, that he was canceling patients, but she promised me it would be done Friday, which is tomorrow.

I felt better after that, and it was time for breakfast.  When I was taking last night’s sock off of Elvon’s foot, he cried out in pain.  That just about never happens, so I took a look at his leg.  His left knee, which has been withered since he had polio as a kid, was twice the size of the good one.

So, here I am in CHOMP, Community Hospital of the Monterey Peninsula, and Elvon is off having a CT Scan and a bunch of X-Rays.  It looks like we are a shoe-in for the Rehab center now.  “tis an ill wind.

We had a treat Friday night, at our friends’ house in Carmel.  Pat and Mike came to visit us, and they brought Chinese Food from Tommy’s Wok, the only decent Chinese food for miles, according to the Scalbergs.  We believe them, because we met them when the four of us were working in Hong Kong 25 years ago.  We didn’t have a waiter, so one of us had to be the photographer.  All the pictures came out blurry, this is the best of the lot.

I think we have found respite care, for Elvon.  I sent over his medical workup, and will finalize Monday, if both parties want to.  They need to approve based on what the doctor wrote, and I need to drop by there, sniff around, and get the feel of the care home.  It’s in Monterey.

After I wrote that, I went over to look at Carmel Hills Care Center.  It had some iffy ratings online and I wanted to give it the smell test.  It’s bright and cheerful, and spotlessly clean.  A very nice gal, named Donne, took me around.  It was lunch time, and a lot of the residents were gathered in the dining room.  The smell was of food, nothing as appetizing as the Lodge, of course, but Donne showed me the menu for the week, and it looked good.  She also shared that they had a new Executive Director, and there had been a huge improvement in the meals.  Now they use fresh meat and cook on site.  They used to use mostly canned stuff.  No wonder there were some iffy ratings.  They have a gym, with a recumbent bicycle, which Elvon really needs, and physical therapists on staff.  He needs all of this, and I need a break.  Come Monday morning, I’ll be negotiating him in.

Saturday’s news from the Residents’ Council contained this cheery sentence.  “Yesterday the Santa Rosa Fire Department completed its inspection of FGL and The Terraces and cleared them for occupancy.”  I like that.  It may still be up to a couple of weeks, but we are going home.  Sadly, I don’t think we will be living together any more.  It breaks my heart, but everyone is telling me I have to do it to save myself, and, I get it.

I have something to look forward to, today.  Elvon’s daughter Susan is driving down here for dinner, and will stay the night, to be here to support us, as we go through the separation process.  I feel better sharing that burden.  Thanks, love.  I know Cat and Matt want to be here, too, but she’s on the other side of the country, and supports me by phone.  It’s a tough time.

Our good FGL friends, Mike and Cliff have been back to the site and reported:

For those who have not been up to Fountaingrove since the fire, prepare to be shocked.  It really looks like the pictures of war zones in Syria, except the streets are impeccably clean – not sure if they had street sweepers or if it was just the wind at the time of the fire.  Last weekend, they made people with passes exit to the east.  So we had to drive all the way through all the destruction.  The pictures on TV do not do it justice.  It just seems to go on forever.  On the other hand, it is almost surreal when you come up to FGL/Stonefield on Bicentennial because you see almost nothing until you get almost to FGL.  Then there is the burned meadow across Thomas Lake Harris Drive and the burned down Oaks Condominiums to the north of FGL.  But they are so flattened that if you did not know they had been there, you might not even notice that there is nothing there.  Travelling on around Thomas Lake Harris Drive, reveals that there is very little left – just a single house here or there.  But mostly everything is gone.

We will know on Monday, when we can move back in, and it looks like it won’t be more than a couple of weeks.  All would be well except that Elvon has been in a steady decline, since we left.  I am getting home help, and the Physical Therapist, who was here yesterday, agrees with me that there is no reason why he cannot transfer to a walker or a chair.  But, he won’t. When presented with the option, he shakes something terrible, and refuses to budge.  No one will take him except a full on memory care place, and I am desperately trying to find one, that will only charge me an arm and a leg, and not both of them.

I wrote that yesterday.  Last night he transferred nicely, had dinner at the table and transferred back into bed.  In the middle of the night he got up, transferred nicely to the chair and the toilet, and that solved a problem that had been bothering me for three days.

Our wonderful friends, Pat and Jo Gibbons, did some phone work, and I think they have turned up a place, nearby.  I need to get out and have a look at it, but meanwhile, I sent them the Doctor’s work up, to get him approved.  If he continues well, it might be better to keep him here, until the Lodge re-opens, so as not to disturb him too much.  These are more familiar surroundings.  Candy and Ernie, bless their hearts, are okay with that, despite having other house guests arriving.  We love our fabulous friends.

And, we’ll wait until Monday, when FGL lets us know our re-entry date and make the decision, then.

I bought the Scalbergs’ cat, Tony, a present.  It’s a rubber grooming tool for short-haired cats.  He loves it.  He purred and purred last night, and I got a good bit of hair out of him.  It came on a card, with raised plastic cover, held on with just a staple.  So I didn’t have to destroy the packaging to get the tool out.  The packaging came in handy a half-hour later when I found this darling little lizard in the family room.

I emptied him out into the garden, and did not throw away this packaging.

We are finally getting a bit of help.  It is from from VNA (Visiting Nurses) now.  The admitting one was just here.  She will get him some PT and try to find us a nearby memory care place.  A social worker should call me soon.  I will accept any place here, or up in Marin or  Sonoma Counties.  Even the City would do.  I’ll make that clear when the social worker calls.    The PT called and will visit Elvon tomorrow at one.  Hopefully he or she will be able to teach him how to transfer and that he will remember.  I am having no luck in that regard.

Robert May, our Executive Director, just wrote us that he is hoping that residents of FGL and The Terraces will be permitted to move back in some time during the second week of November (November 5-11).  As indicated in the message from OSL that was emailed to some residents, on Monday, October 30, they expect to announce a definitive move-in date

Elvon’s transfers are getting sloppier and sloppier, and more likely to injure both of us.  Saturday night, he just rose and dove over the side of the wheelchair, to get into bed, instead of steadying himself on the night stand.  The result of this was me leaping over the back of the chair to catch his butt and lift his legs onto the bed.   My back hurts but it wasn’t permanent damage.  I did a bunch of exercises promptly. My fear factor is rising, as his abilities decline.

Kenny and Maria, from across the street, came for dinner Sunday night.  To me, cooking is worth it to get the company. They are a very nice young couple, living with Kenny’s parents, because his mother had a stroke and her care is too much for his father.  Elvon only made one successful transfer today, and that was to his wheelchair for breakfast, which was about 1:30 pm.  I couldn’t get him back on the bed for his afternoon nap.  Kenny had to help him into bed on Sunday night.

I found out yesterday, that Cyprus Ridge, the Rehab Care Center down here,  I had hopes would take Elvon, will not.  The fax they received from our doctor, clearly says “Severe Dementia” and there are a rehabilitation center.  They are supposed to put him back out in the world on the road to viability.  They were helpful with leads.

I followed up with “The Cottages of Carmel”, who have Assisted Living and Memory care, just like FGL.  Memory Care is full, the last place having gone to a fire evacuee.  They would consider Assisted Living, for a month,  if they could find some furniture.  I had the doc send over the order and went to bed praying.  This morning they reviewed the doctor’s orders and had to refuse us on the grounds of “Severe Dementia”.  They could only take him in Memory Care, and that, they had none of.

Meanwhile, I was pursuing home care options and I think I have scored on that, but I don’t have our appointment yet.  The outfit is “Visiting Nurses Association and Hospice”  I like working with that organization.  It’s Medicare Certified and not for profit.

They should call me this afternoon and come tomorrow.  They will only come three times a week for an hour or so, but it should be enough for me to get him cleaned up and the bed changed.  The reality is that I will probably have to keep him bedridden until we get back to the Lodge.

I would have far preferred to be with the rest of the residents in Albany, but it was not to be.  While I was well ahead of the curve in getting us out and keeping us safe, we seem to be behind it now, as our real need developed later.

Enough of us.  We have fine friends and a very comfortable roof over our beleaguered heads.  And, soon, we will have help.

Susan Jones was the Police Chief in Healdsburg, before she and Toni retired to Fountaingrove Lodge.  I just got her Facebook post of how they evacuated.  It’s worth a read:

From Susan on FB:

Well, it’s been 2 weeks since we were rousted out of bed by a friend who had called us at 1:00 am on the 9th to tell us to evacuate immediately because the fire was across the street from us.

We jumped up, grabbed a few things just when the power went out. We leashed the dogs and headed for the front door, hearing a knock at the door and finding Ralph, one of our residents, who told us to “Evacuate NOW!” We left immediately, heading for our RV which was parked outside of the garage. When we opened the door to the outside, the smoke was thick with burning embers flying past our faces. We had to direct our flashlights down so we could see the ground and know where we were stepping. The wind was blowing so hard, we couldn’t hear each other. We made it to Bianca (our RV) and pulled out of the complex literally driving by memory of where the road was because we couldn’t see it. Too much smoke.

We thought we’d head north, since we knew plenty of people in Healdsburg but were turned away at the freeway entrance because the fire had jumped 101. We headed south on 101 passing dozens of emergency vehicles heading north. So odd not to be one of them. So odd to be a victim, not the first responder.

We pulled off in Rohnert Park, spending the night in the Home Depot parking lot. Initially, we were one of 7 or 8 cars, but within the next few hours, the parking lot was full and the Home Depot employees were rolling out shopping carts full of water bottles to all of us there. Toni’s cousins, Sharon Long, Rae Lynne and Aunt Rosalie joined us there. It was a long night, but fortunately, we had a bathroom. Thank God for Bianca!

Since then, we have stayed with friends in Healdsburg, until making the decision to leave for fresher air on the 12th. We spent one night in Fort Bragg, then decided to find more permanent lodging since we have our dogs with us and rain was expected. We drove south to Manhattan Beach, then settled in Carlsbad, where we’ve been since the 17th. It’s a nice area and the air is clear.

Bill Baird’s interview on the main lodge evacuation: http://sfbaytimes.com/fountaingrove-lodge-survives-north-bay-fires-interview-resident-bill-baird/

We have since learned that our friend, Mary, lost her home in this fire. In fact, the whole neighborhood next to us is gone, and the neighborhood next to them. Fountaingrove Lodge is still standing but we’re not allowed to go back. The latest update is that we may be allowed in sometime between Nov. 6th and the 20th. We’ll be making our way back this Saturday, as we plan to stay in San Ramon at the Residence Inn there for a week or so. It’ll be nice to be back in the bay area and to visit friends. We miss everyone!

Gil and Sandy Mercier offered a bolt-hole in France.  Such wonderful friends we have, and France did look good to me.  Rod and Claude Anderson offered Montreal and Florida, too.  But, Elvon is not very mobile, so none of these is an option for him.  We are making do pretty well in the Carmel Highlands, at the lovely home of Candy and Ernie Scalberg.  I’ll be happy to get back to assisted living, though.

Ulla and John Brown made a more practical offer.  They have a house in Palm Desert, to which they have retreated, as their Napa house hurned to the ground.  As of yesterday, when I wrote this, we were hoping for Belmont Village in Albany, near Berkeley, where we would get all the services we have at the Lodge.  It looks like we will be moving back to the Lodge around the middle of November.

What some of you may not understand is that Elvon is post-Polio and has Alzheimers’, which his doctor rates as “severe dementia”.  His left leg is essentially useless, and he cannot always command the other one.  He does not consistently understand that you have to push down on a walker.  Sometimes he tries to get into it by pulling up.  Other times, it’s fine.  Friday night, I had to call the Fire Department at 1:00 am, to get him off the toilet.  This is why we need assisted living.  I am not enough of an assist, by myself.

Sunday morning, just now, I spoke to Robert May, Executive Director, Fountaingrove Lodge.  The news is not great from that end.  Robert is working at the Albany facility, Belmont Villages, and he doesn’t exactly have us moving in the day after tomorrow.  Elvon is too much of a care.  So, they would put him in their Memory Care building, if there is space, and charge appropriately.  Some money would come back from Fountaingrove Lodge, but we will still be paying most of our rent here.  It looks like the plan I started last week, including getting him into Cyprus Ridge Care Center, is the better one.  I started that last Monday, but it got stalled, when our own doctor was unreachable to fax the workup.  He was affected by the Napa fires, of course.  I’ll get back on that first thing Monday morning.  Robert is pretty sure that’s our solution.

So, that’s it for a beautiful Sunday morning in Carmel.  I only got up at 10:45 am.  My nights are weird.  There’s always a break in the middle, where Elvon needs me for an hour or so, and it takes me another hour to read myself back down.  I am letting myself sleep in, because I know how important it is to keep my strength up.  So far, so good.

Today, I checked voice mail, on a whim, not because it told me I had anything, just a whim.  There were 17 messages waiting.  They were there because, there are no bars in this house except a wine bar.  It’s a great house, in Carmel, overlooking the ocean.  It’s comfortable and the air is clean.  HOWEVER, Calling my cell phone will not reach me until we move somewhere else.  My cell phone does not tell me there are messages waiting either.  Sorry, guys.

A number of your voice mails told me you were happy I was back in Santa Rosa.  That’s not true, either.  The greeting is left over from when we came back from Montreal.  I tried to change it and its instructions were so convoluted that I couldn’t figure them out.  Where’s the turn off/turn on of voice mail?  I was able to change it to a generic greeting.  That doesn’t give me a chance to record the best number to reach me.  It’s 831-626-4516.

Thank you all for your concern.  It is nice to know we are loved and cared about.  I’ll return your calls one by one, when I get a chance.  Elvon is requiring a lot more care here, and is losing ground with his transfers to and from the wheelchair.  It can take me an hour to get him from the bed to the wheelchair.  And, tonight, we are having the neighbors in for dinner, so can’t return calls them.  BTW, they are Hope and Sandy Hale, who were on the Barge on the Canal de Bourgogne, and will be joining us on the Shannon river in 2018. Looking forward to being social, again.

We will be moving into some form of assisted living, as soon as Oakmont, Fountaingrove Lodge’s parent, can liberate a spot for us.  That will be some time next week, I guess, it is 4:40 pm on Friday, and they haven’t called yet. When we go, we will likely be there until mid-November, as our home gets decontaminated.  It’s a process.

Our fire has been explained, and it’s terrifying.  There were fire tornadoes and they came right straight at us.  Here’s the map, from the San Francisco Chronicle.  :

Our home, Fountaingrove Lodge, is located under the lower black arrow in the tornado graphic.  At midnight on Sunday night, we, with Pat and Mike drove down Fountaingrove Parkway and turned right onto 101.  We drove through thick smoke, with flames on the right shoulder, where you see the red arrow.  Somebody up there likes us, a lot.

You can read the full story at http://tinyurl.com/ybjtw5a5

The wineries of Napa are reporting in.  The ones that are back in business and donating all or part of their tasting room fees are, Miner in Oakville, 100% of tasting fees, 25% of sales going to Napa Valley Community Disaster Relief Fund. Silver Trident 100% of tasting fees to  The North Bay Fire Relief Fund, ZD donating 50% of all tasting fees to the Napa Valley Community Foundation supporting the fire relief efforts.  Chapellet and Frog’s Leap also reported in safe and back in business.

We are healthy, except for smoke inhalation, but I am losing the battle to keep Elvon smart and strong enough to do the transfers he needs to do.  So, we will be moving to Belmont in Albany, as soon as our Lodge Management can guarantee I won’t be driving all that way for nothing.  They will tell us tomorrow, I hope.  I have been talking to Marissa, our wonderful nurse.

I am still passing on that which comes my way, as a few of you have thanked me for that.

Belonging to Vintners’ Collective got me this:

Bob Almeida from Lagniappe let us know that they had extensive fire damage on their property. Their guest house burned, as did a car, three outbuildings, and half of their vines.  We were also very sad to learn that Shirley Roy lost her home and all buildings on the property. Her home, which Shirley and her late husband Charles purchased from legendary golfer Johnny Miller, was also where Roy’s offices were located and where guests to Roy Estate have been hosted since the winery’s beginning.

Gordon Huether, who has a workshop and gallery on Monticello, wrote:

To our friends and colleagues: We are so grateful to be able to write to you today! Our Studio was spared by the Northern California wildfires and we are happy to share that we are back and open for business! In an effort to help getting this beautiful Valley back on its feet, we encourage you to visit Napa Valley, spend a few days here and support the many local businesses that have been affected by this natural disaster.Though the aftermath of this tragedy will be felt for a long time to come, we feel extremely fortunate to remain unscathed

The Napa Valley Opera House, with our potties in it, is unharmed, but, like the Lodge, needs a lot of work.  They plan to reopen with shows, November 7.  They will need your support, and some good entertainment will be what you need, too.

Speaking of shows, there will be fundraisers aplenty for Fire victims:

You can help California wine regions recover from devastating wildfires: Attend fire relief fundraising events. Look for the #CAWineStrong hashtag. Post fire relief fundraising events. Go here. When you write the “event name,” include #CAWineStrong.

http://www.localwineevents.com/  has Napa events.  No specific Sonoma Events yet

The Scalbergs are at their time share in Hawaii. Ernie sent a couple of photos.  This one is looking toward the ocean.

Ernie reports “We arrived in time for free ice cream cones and gusty winds. The wind is keeping the temperature comfortable but it can blow a golf ball right off the green. Supposed to calm by Thursday.  Tough days in paradise. In the meantime we have discovered some new restaurants.  More hard work ahead.”

We are still at their house in Carmel, and likely will be for the duration.  As long as I can keep Elvon strong enough, in mind and body, to effect his wheelchair transfers, we are good here.

I got 9 hours of sleep last night, after CalFire reported our nearest fire was 100% contained.  Now there’s one growing in San Jose, but that’s at least 50 miles away.  I have a lot of faith in our wonderful first responders, especially as the y are 11,000 strong. This fire is 200 acres and 5% contained, and it looks tiny to me.