February 23 was a sea day.  It was quiet at the desk.  Ken Mikel stopped by to say “Hello” and that was about it.  I finalized a newsletter, had it printed, and was ready to deliver it by noon.  It apologized for the lack of appetizers at the first cocktail party, invited them to the do-over, and gave them everything they needed to know about the shore excursion, and then some.

That got people moving, who had not before, and I had four more takers, and a bunch of people calling in their allergies.  Adam, Judy and I ate in the Sushi restaurant, and it was good, but not exceptional.  We had done better with the Tuscan Grill a couple of nights ago.

February 24, we docked in Phu My, port for Ho Chi Minh City, or Saigon. This was another case where it paid to get A&K, for transport in and a very nice tour.  We loved the park, where the locals take their birds, in cages, to sing to each other.  It keeps them in good voice and the sun brings out the bright colors in their feathers.  I didn’t get any shopping in, which was disappointing, because the main market in Saigon, is probably the cheapest place in the world to get clothing.  I did manage to get a hat, as an interim replacement for my Tilley, and we had a wonderful time. The hat looked nice on the Cyclo Panoramique.  That’s how we toured the local markets, and streets where people actually live.  They also took us down broad French boulevards, to The Majestic Hotel, where I had planned lunch.  It has been considerably tarted up since the last time I was there, in 2016.  The room we ate in was Louis V, over the top, and the food was French-Vietnamese fusion.  A different experience than planned, but a good one, none-the-less.

One of our stops was the monument to Bo Tat, who self-immolated in 1963, starting a number of such protests.  The Vietnamese call it “The American War” and they hate the Americans.  They hated the French in the first place and were quite happy to be communists under Ho Chi Minh.  We did all that for absolutely nothing.  We should have minded our own business.

Our tour for five had become a tour for nine, when Luis Perez, looking for a sign with his name on it, found A&K’s sign with mine.  The Perez, and their friends, were apparently stood up by their own tour guide, so we took them in.  They did the negotiating.  I didn’t touch it.  They were very, very happy with what they got.

The do-over cocktail party, the next day, did go very well.  This time 26 people attended, still a respectable turnout, and the hors d’oeuvres were very nice.  It was a formal night, so there was another production show, called iBroadway, and it was very good.  We have been skipping or walking out of the individual entertainers, who have not been all that good, or appealing.

On February 26, we docked in Chan May, port for DaNang, Hoi An and Hué.  We were all up, bright and early, and gathered in the Rendezvous Lounge, by 7:00 am, waiting for the call to disembark.  Every single person who was not coming had called me, so that when the call came on the PA, I could just send them off in the direction of the buses.  Our guide, Tang, was exceptional.  His English was clear as a bell and he was very well, if locally, educated.  We all thought he might have been to school in England, he was that good.

On the hour-and-a-half drive to Hué, he told us a lot about the country, its inhabitants, their housing, the French-built railway, and his family.  His father had worked for the South Vietnamese government, which meant he had to go a nasty re-education program in 1973.  He is in his fifties but looks very, very old, now.  Many Vietnamese look way older than their ages.  Dengue fever is largely to blame.  They have leap-frogged us in technology.  Satellite TV is very cheap, as is Internet and Cellphone service.  Cars are very expensive because the government is trying to keep their numbers down.  The average salary is $15/day.  Tang will make five times that today, just with the tip DV has authorized me to give him.

Tang explained that just about everyone has a little shop in front of his house, and they are not regulated by the government at all.  So, what happens when an item, say a new noodle dish, proves popular, soon four more shops are selling it.  They are battling inflation, 50% in the last five years, but they do have good health insurance, and it’s very cheap, like $34/year.  That entitles you to the local government hospitals.  If you want your choice of any of the private hospitals, that’ll cost you $200/year.  It’s a bargain.  Tang has it.  He also spent $1,000 having his teeth straightened about five years ago.  His orthodontist was good.  His smile is very beguiling.

The Imperial Palace and TuDuc’s tomb are grand sites, in beautiful gardens, with ancient bonzais.  We crawled all over them.  There were a lot of steps, but there were places to wait for those who found them too challenging.  Our lunch at Jardins De La Carambole, an old French mansion, was exceptional. It was like eating with a bunch of cats. Everyone was purring.  We lingered a bit too long and missed the Lady Pagoda, but no one minded.  They wanted to feel comfortable, not panicked, on the way back to the ship. Everyone loved our guide.  He was knowledgeable, personable, and his English was perfect.  A lot of us wanted to take him home.

I went to both sail-away and the show that night.  The performer was a young Jamaican singer, named Monique Dehaney, and she was really excellent, peppy and exuberant.  What’s more, she could actually sing.  She’s just starting her career in show business.  I think we’ll hear more from her.

The next day, February 27, we were in Halong Bay, port for Hanoi.  The drive to Hanoi is even longer that the drive to Bangkok, and there’s no overnight.  Very few people even considered it.  We took a ship’s shore excursion on Halong Bay.  It was damp and dreary, and the boat’s people used our table to display cheap jewelry for sale.  Adam and Judy did get off and toured the caves, and pronounced them well worth it, but that may have been all of it.  I complained about the chotsky vendors and got a bottle of wine.  I hope my other two cabins did, too.  Must check on that.

We ate in the Tuscan Grille again, and it was still very good.  Urp.

Next Assignment for me – Maybe a cruise for you?

It’s a Mediterranean Cruise in October. We go Rome to Rome on the Holland America Koningsdam.  I have two cabins booked and it’s a Distinctive Voyage.  I bid for and got it.  Who else is coming with me? Take a look:    https://www.hollandamerica.com/details?webItineraryIdForAudit=E8M10B&fromSearchVacation=true&guestsCount=2&voyageCode=K862&selectedMeta=Interior&shipId=KO  October 8 sailing.

It’s seriously inexpensive.  Treat yourselves to a suite.  Comes with a free cocktail party and shore excursion.  I’ll have no trouble booking you from wherever I am.  Brunch at the Monte Carlo Yacht Club, anyone?  I can get us in. And yes, if you want me to take care of you, you buy it from moi.

Erratum:  The Marina Bay Sands consists of three 57 STOREY towers.  57 feet don’t make much of a tower, as Steve Harrold pointed out.

Sunday, February 18, There’s always a lot of work for me on the day we board, and I was none too happy to find out that this is an older Celebrity ship, and the broadcast feature isn’t on it.  So, after I met my Event Coordinator, Itemara, and nailed down our times and dates, I printed my letters, stuffed them into their folders, delivered them and called 25 staterooms.  Most of them weren’t there, but I left messages, and reported three malfunctioning phones.

Pat and Mike are in this fancy suite, so they had dinner in their fancy dining room.  Luckily, Adam and Judy, being Montrealers, eat late, so we were fine on the later end of open seating.  Dinner was good, too.

Monday, February 19, was a sea day, so I had office hours.  A number of people stopped by, to hand in their tour contracts, and I got their pictures, so I could learn their names.  The Future Cruise people stopped by, and I invited them to our cocktail and showed them our DV brochure.  They volunteered to photocopy the Celebrity pages and make a handout for the group.  What a good idea.

When I closed up shop, I worked the phone in my cabin for an hour, until it was time for our cocktail party, at 4:30 pm, which was exceptionally well attended.  The Future Cruise handout was a success.  The people liked seeing when they could hit another DV. Too bad the hors d’oeuvres didn’t come.

The all-singing, all-dancing production show, Boogie Wonderland, was wonderful, and so was dinner.

Tuesday, February 20, 2018 Our first stop was Koh Samui, a resort island in Thailand.  We got off, found ourselves a taxi, and went to the beach, where we swam, I had a massage, and we ate Thai beach food.  The pad Thai was excellent, and so was the Thai beer.

Wednesday, February 21: As the city of Bangkok, is a couple of hours form its port, Laem Chabang) our group pf five had decided to overnight there.  Once you are doing that, you might as well do it in style, because a full Abercrombie and Kent tour isn’t much more than two ship’s shuttles.  I booked the hotel on the Internet.  That’s the trick.  If A & K book the hotel, it doubles the price.

After Pat and Mike and I waited about 15 minutes on the dock, while Adam and Judy searched their room frantically for their Thai baht, we joined our A & K guide, Teresa, who was lovely.  She has been with A & K for 23 years.  Tour Guide is a very good job in these parts.  On the way to the city, on a brand new highway that puts ours to shame, she dispensed all kinds of factoids, about Thailand’s exports, rice, rubber, automobiles, etc. and pointed out their national flower, Laburnum, which is all over the place.  She shyly told us they called it the “Golden Shower” and Westerners always laughed. 

They had a big flood about 8 years ago, and the streets of Bangkok turned into canals.  They are losing manufacturing plants to Vietnam, as the Thai economy strengthens and labor becomes more expensive.  They also have a lot of migrant workers from Laos, Cambodia and Myanmar, seeking those nice Thai wages.  There are many religions in Thailand, Buddhism being the strongest.  It is rooted in Hinduism, which explains the architecture, but Buddha rejected the caste system, because no one can choose where, when and to whom to be born.

Our hotel was The Peninsula, Bangkok, which I booked at a tremendous bargain, because it is on the wrong side of the river.  But just you wait.  There are financial towers going up all around it.  Soon it will look like Central Hong Kong, and the rate will triple.  For now, I can do nothing but recommend it.  Our rooms were spectacular, and very peaceful.  It felt like Raffles, only as a tower.  We checked in and went off to Cream for lunch, as recommended by Teresa.

Cream was a little Thai restaurant, just outside the front gate and a block to the right.  It had just been renovated, so it was very clean, and the Thai food was very good.  After lunch, we took our van to the Grand Palace and Wat Phra, home of the Emerald Buddha.  I was worried about this attraction, as it had been overrun with very rude Chinese tourists, the last time I was here, in 2013.  The Chinese tourists are still out in force, but they have learned manners in the intervening five years, and it was OK to visit, after all.  It was very hot, though.

We were happy to board a long barge, and continue our tour on the river.  Part of Elvon is now resting peacefully on the Chao Phraya river bed.  We saw Wat Arun, and the Royal Barges, and enjoyed our boat ride.

We ate at the hotel, at Thiptara, its Thai restaurant on the river bank, watching the traffic go by on the river.  We took the tasting menu, with wine pairings and were pleasantly surprised by the quality of Thai wine.  These people planted their vineyards less that twenty years ago, and started selling it ten years ago.  Most of our selections were from “PB” and they were all very nice to drink.  Who would have thunk it?

After dinner, Pat and Mike went off to enjoy their balcony, while Adam, Judy and I boarded the Peninsula’s boat to meet up with the Night Market’s boat.  The night market was fun, but it took us so long to find the part we wanted, that it was closing by the time we got there.  I made an extremely dumb purchase, which I will be happy to show you, if it ever survives the journey home.

The next morning, Pat and Mike, who get up earlier, took The Peninsula’s boat to the other side and walked around, just experiencing Bangkok.  Then they met us for breakfast at the hotel.  After breakfast Adam and Judy went swimming and I spent some quiet time with my computer.  Teresa and the van picked us up around 1:30 pm, and we were back on board in plenty of time for sail-away.

I realized in the van that I had left my Tilley hat at the Pen.  No problem, Teresa phoned them, and after a few emails and $47, I’ll have it back at the Conrad in Hong Kong.

We were met at Changi, Singapore’s airport, by the Marina Bay Sands’ van, and it was smooth sailing to the hotel and through check-in.  What a place.  It’s the one you see in all the ads for Singapore tourism.  A humongous concrete boat spans three 57 foot towers.  There’s an infinity pool up there, restaurants, bars, etc.  In, and below, the towers, are the rooms, a casino, offices, shops, etc.  It overlooks The Gardens by the Bay, which The Sands had to give to Singapore to get to build the complex. That’s fabulous, too.

It’s a full dose of Asia, though, especially at Chinese New Year, when there are a lot of families vacationing.  We got there at bed time, so that’s what we did, and it hit us in the morning, when we went down to forage for food.  The elevators are jammed from about 10:00 am to 11:30 am, when everyone checks out, with their luggage.  They are fast enough, though, and we all found something to eat.

We had no plan for the 16^th and I had to work, but everyone had a good time and we convened at the pool for the afternoon.  It was as advertised, and quite wonderful.  Sue Jamieson, Dr. Sue from Hong Kong, was in Singapore, too, over Chinese New Year.  She texted me and I invited her to join us at the pool, which she did.  Great fun.

Adam had done some research and found an amazing Gin Bar, called the Atlas.  It was in a wonderful art Deco Hotel, and quite the experience.  Sue joined us with a couple of her clients, who were very charming.  It was all very chi-

chi.  I was amused to see a server decanting white wine, at the next table.

So we followed that up with street food at Lau Pa Sat, a short cab ride away.  If you go, Stall Number 8 is the best one.  We had super satays, drank beer and ate chili crab.  That was wonderful, but who said street food was cheap?  It didn’t break the bank, but it was almost $100US for two crabs, and modest sides.

Then we went off to the Singapore Zoo’s night safari, which was fun, but none of the pictures turned out at all.  I won’t have to do that again.

On the 17^th, Adam and Judy took the HopOn HopOff bus, which is good in Singapore, while Pat, Mike and I went to the Jurong Bird Park, where all of the pictures turned out well.  The birds were so colorful. Many of them are extinct in the wild, and the park makes a big point of their breeding programs, so just a few of us, now and in future generations, can see them.  In the evening we went to Little India, where I love to shop for white embroidered tops to wear over cheap Thai and Vietnamese bottoms.  I got a couple, and we had dinner at Banana Leaf Apolo, which never disappoints.

And, on the 18^th, we boarded Celebrity Millennium, bound for Hong Kong.

Next Assignment for me – Maybe a cruise for you?

It’s a Mediterrean Cruise in October. We go Rome to Rome on the Holland America Koningsdam.  I have two cabins booked and it’s a Distinctive Voyage.  I bid for and got it.  Who else is coming with me? Take a look:    https://www.hollandamerica.com/details?webItineraryIdForAudit=E8M10B&fromSearchVacation=true&guestsCount=2&voyageCode=K862&selectedMeta=Interior&shipId=KO  October 8 sailing.

It’s seriously inexpensive.  Treat yourselves to a suite.  Comes with a free cocktail party and shore excursion.  I’ll have no trouble booking you from wherever I am.  Brunch at the Monte Carlo Yacht Club, anyone?  I can get us in.

A group doesn’t get better than this.  The two cabins I sold on the ship are Adam and Judy Symansky, and Pat Gustafson and Mike Desky.  Let me introduce you, if you don’t know them already.  I went to McGill with Adam and Judy.  Judy is an AOPi.  She was our chapter president, when I was there.  She’s great, and so is Adam.  They started going steady in high school, and they’re still married.  When we were at McGill I dated Adam’s best friend, Harvey Schneider, and you have read of him in these pages, too.  Sadly, he’s gone, but his wonderful wife, Aviva, welcomed Elvon and me, whenever we got anywhere near Jerusalem.  Judy was a librarian at McGill’s Management library and Adam was an Oscar-winning producer at the National Film Board of Canada.

Pat Gustafson, Mike Desky and I, all live at Fountaingrove Lodge, fabulous LGBT Senior Living, in California’s wine country.  I have known Pat for almost 25 years.  She and her husband, Bob, were mainstays of “The Usual Suspects”, a serious partying crowd.  Pat and I were particular friends.  She and Mike hooked up last year, fleeing the wildfires, and they are one of the greatest couples you’ll ever meet.  What I love best about it is that they are both 80 years old, and they met at the gay lodge.  It’s a great story.  Never give up hope.

Santa Rosa, Friday, February 9, 2018

Adam and Judy were delivered to me late Friday night, by the intrepid Eric Hartman.  He’s my driver whenever I need one and he is fantastic, unfailingly courteous, always on time, big and strong, and has a ton of personality.  He has done a lot of things in his life, run fitness centers, written books, invented things, flipped real estate, and started new philanthropies.  I’ll give you his phone number, if you want a smooth, entertaining ride, in our neck of the wine country.

So, we had a 2014 Dare, by Viader, as a nightcap, and I let them go to bed.  I knew we’d never be up in time for our Lodge continental breakfast, and they might be hungrier, so I had been saving eggs for days.  We have live chickens at the Lodge, all named after famous Lesbians.  It’s not the best laying season, but I managed to collect 5 eggs.  So, I scrambled them, with bacon, toast and English muffins, they were quite the treat.

Then we had a meeting with Pat and Mike, just to dot our eyes and cross our tees, before we went off wine-tasting in the Russian River Valley.  We took 101 North to Lytton Springs road, and drove down West Dry Creek Road, very scenic, highly recommended, with at least a dozen wineries worth a stop, on it.  We didn’t have a lot of time, though, so we did a drive through at Armida, which has stunning views, and made our 3:30 pm appointment at MacRostie, whose wine I love, and which also has views to die for, on three sides, no less. Tastings are very civilized, there.  They sit you down and bring you the wine. It’s lovely.

In a merry mood, we drove back to the Lodge for cocktails and dinner with Bob & Carol Nicholas, and Pat Finot.  Everyone liked everyone else, and Chef Adam’s dinner, and we drank some very good wines, a MacRostie Pinot among them.  That took care of Saturday.

Sunday, February 11, 2018

I had some errands to do in Napa, so I had saved them for Sunday, as Adam and Judy had never visited us there.  We left around 11:30 am, turning right out of the Lodge, where there are only a couple of houses, now.  The Fountaingrove area was hit hard by the wildfires, and the fire stopped just above us, where CalFire drew a line.  It continued down both sides of us, mind you, but it’s very striking, just above us, and for miles, along Fountaingrove Parkway.

We hooked up with Highway 12, and drove through the town of Sonoma, circling its sguare.  It’s a Spanish mission town, with a barracks, among the inns, restaurants, tasting rooms, and chi-chi dress shops.  One could easily spend an afternoon right there. On to Napa, past the burned out hulk of the Clover Stornetta dairy, Domaine Carneros, and the DiRosa Preserve.  These last two make great stops, too. They’ll have to come back.

We hit Vintners’ Collective up for my spring shipment, without even stopping to taste.  It’s a shame because they have great wines, but we were on a mission.  I dropped a piece of jewelry off at Lori Wear’s to be repaired.  Then we went to Silverado.  I took them up the row of palm trees and showed them the club house.  It shows well, all clean and white.  You see it on TV every fall on the golf channel.

Then we circled the golf course, seeing the devastation on Westgate and up Atlas Peak.  I turned in at Silverado Oaks to show them our old house.  It’s still standing, but it’s a waste land.  20 houses out of 38 in our compound were flattened and most of them were right around us.  It’s so sad. I hope this time next year it looks better than ever.  They are, of course, going to rebuild.

On up the Silverado Trail, to Frog’s Leap, where France Scott works.  Frog’s Leap has been there since the early eighties.  The wine is made in the French style, and is absolutely delicious, nice and lean.  I had forgotten how much we liked it. France was her usual wonderful self, and Adam and Judy loved her.  Of course they would, just like home.  Our people.  We went out into the Cabernet vineyard and buried a little of Elvon.  France can say hello to him, when she goes to work, and it will bring me back there oftener.

Our next stop was Viader, up on Howell Mountain, with a fabulous view of the Napa Valley, and scrumptious wines.  Like MacRostie and Frog’s Leap, they let you sit down and bring the wines to you.  It was cool and windy, and they weren’t busy, so we lucked out and got a cave tour, too.  On the way to the cave, we buried more of Elvon, in their lovely vineyard, overlooking the Napa Valley.  He’ll be happy there.

Whenever I am up valley, as we say in Napa, and it’s near dinnertime, I call Joan Westgate, to see if she wants to come out.  She usually does, and today, since I had friends from Montreal, she offered a pre-dinner house tour.  When Ed died, Joanie sold a 6,000 sq.ft. house, with a mountain vineyard and incredible rose garden, and moved into 1100 sq.ft. in the middle of St, Helena.  It is most interesting, and uber-comfortable.  So is Joan, one of the loveliest friends a body can have.  Everybody loves the Symanskys, too, so you can imagine how well they got along.  We went to dinner at Archetype, which was still fun, but I think the food is going downhill.  Next time, I’ll pick Market.  The wine was good, though, Viader, of course.

Over the hill and home by ten.  So we had another bottle of wine.  I had been reined in because of the mountain drive.  One can, of course, correct that.

Monday, February 12, 2018

We got up early, had a quick Lodge continental breakfast, and headed out for the City.  We were picking Kathy Stefano up at the San Francisco Maritime Museum, which is now a Senior Center.  Kathy takes classes there, Like Qui Gong, and yoga, and gives classes on acting.  She was a great nun in “Late Night Catechism” where we first met her.  If you have been reading this blog for years, you’ll remember her fishing out Elvon’s birth certificate, so the Mendelsons could get him a passport in a day, and he could fly over the Pacific, three times in three days.  I trust we are only doing it once.  It’s hard to lose your passport on a non-stop.

Kathy used to be a tour guide in San Francisco, driving a Mr. Toad’s Tours’ bus, so she knows her stuff.  First she took me to my haircut, then she took Adam and Judy to Fisherman’s Wharf, to Swan’s Fish Market, for Dungeness Crab Louie.  It’s a local delicacy when it’s in season.  But we weren’t eating it there, we had a better thing going.  Chris Silver had offered lunch at her apartment with a view of the Bay, on Broadway, opposite The Hamlyn School.  It doesn’t get a lot better than that.

After lunch, Kathy drove us all around the neighborhood, pointing out painted ladies of note, for their beauty or famous owners.  We had a walk along Haight Street, ending at the corner of Ashbury.  It’s still interesting.  Then she took us to the Presidio, and Golden Gate Park.  Kathy is the shadow in the picture.

We ended up at the St. Francis Yacht Club for sundowners.  The sun doesn’t exactly set there, but it has a nice atmosphere for a drink.  Mine was Coke.  It’s about having to drive.

We crossed the Golden Gate in the Dark, and stopped for a minute for a view from Vista Point, before making our way to Sausalito.  There we found Poggios, an old style Italian restaurant, to sample another of San Francisco’s famous cuisines.  It was very good, and so was the bottle of Honig sauvignon blanc, that we had with it, another old favorite.  Another wine and chocolate nightcap.

Tuesday, February 12, 2018

The plan was to spend the last of my points on a full English breakfast, at the Lodge, but nature got in the way.  It was 9:17 am when we got there.  The chef starts cleaning the stove at 9:15 am, and that’s that.  We were out running errands at lunchtime, and none of us eats it anyway, so I left 44 points on the table.  I hate that.

Eric picked us up at three in a Mercedes Sprinter van, which was just what we needed.  He gave us the nicest tour of the Presidio and Park, again.  It turns out, it’s the best way to get through the City, when you are going to the airport.  The sun was shining, and just starting to lower itself in the sky.  The lighting was just gorgeous.  John Mullen showed Geri Randall and me this route, about a month ago.  It really is the way to go.

We checked in to The Best Western El Rancho Inn, and I got an hour to work a bit, before it was time for dinner with Adam and Judy’s Cape Cod friend Cindy, and her husband Rick. They took us to an Italian restaurant, too.  It was more unassuming then Poggio’s, and had a more limited menu, but the food was better.  I can’t believe I ate the whole lasagna.  It had a forgettable name like The West End Café.  I think it was in Millbrae…We washed it down with an nice Willamette Valley pinot noir.

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

We got the hotel shuttle at the crack of dawn and boarded without a hitch.  We are flying Singapore Air, Pat and Mike in business, probably asleep on those nice flatbeds, Adam and Judy in premium economy, which looks like business used to look, and moi in steerage.  It’s actually not so bad.  The middle seat is empty, so we can spread out a bit.  My row mate is very nice, and I have got a ton of work done.

I took a break for turbulence between two and three, when I had to close my computer for fear of tossing my cookies on it.  Now it’s 9:30 pm, and we have been on board for 12 hours, of which I have worked at least ten.  I think I’ll try to close my eyes.

Next Assignment for me – Maybe a cruise for you?

In the last frantic week, before the Symanskys arrived, I booked a couple of cabins for clients on a Mediterrean Cruise in October. It’s Rome to Rome on the Holland America Koningsdam.  Then Distinctive Voyages sent out an email with 2018 cruises that still need a host.  There it was.  I bid for and got it.  Who else is coming with me? Take a look:    https://www.hollandamerica.com/details?webItineraryIdForAudit=E8M10B&fromSearchVacation=true&guestsCount=2&voyageCode=K862&selectedMeta=Interior&shipId=KO  October 8 sailing.

It’s seriously inexpensive.  Treat yourselves to a suite.  Comes with a free cocktail party and shore excursion.  I’ll have no trouble booking you from wherever I am.  Brunch at the Monte Carlo Yacht Club, anyone?  I can get us in.

Elvon Harris – May 19, 1937 – December 26, 2017

L Elvon Harris, died peacefully in Santa Rosa on December 26, 2017.  He was born in the Redwoods, son of the Reverend August English Harris and Mary Frances Doty.  He is survived by his wife, Helen Megan, his daughters, Cathryn (Matt Marchesi) and Susan, his sister Esther Ruth (Herb Arden), his niece Kristina (Jerry Wen) and his cousins Mark, and Craig Doty(Karen).  He is predeceased by his twin brother, Eddie.

Growing up, he lived all over California, from the Redwoods, Southern California, the Central Valley, and even a Navajo Indian reservation.  Elvon graduated from Occidental College in 1958, an SAE.  He was recruited on campus by The Manufacturers’ Life Insurance Company of Canada, and started his career working for them in Hawaii.  He did well, and exhibited strong management skills very early on.

Soon the Company moved him to its head office in Toronto.  His jobs included managing the Company’s Data Processing Operations, its US Operations, and its International Operations.  In this latter job, he appointed himself to head up Manulife’s Asia-Pacific Operations, which counted six countries when he retired in 1994.

While in Hong Kong, he met and married Helen Megan, from Montreal.  They retired to the Napa Valley, to enjoy golf at Silverado, travel, and the valley’s fine food and wine.  Soon Elvon and Helen were working for the Opera House, the Symphony and the Napa Valley Wine Auction.  They continued to travel, spending a lot of time on board ships.  They sailed around the world four times, around Australia and New Zealand, South America, and Asia, and took countless shorter trips.  Meanwhile, his daughters grew and prospered, with Cathryn a Federal Constitutional attorney on Long Island, and Susan selling commercial real estate, and living in Marin County.

Elvon had a good life, and no regrets.  Everyone loved him as a great manager, and a better friend.  He will be sorely missed, by his wife, Helen Megan, his daughters Cathryn Harris Marchesi (Matthew), and Susan Harris, his sister Esther Arden (Herb), his niece Kristina Arden Wen (Jerry), and cousins Karen and Craig Doty.

His family would like to thank Fountaingrove Lodge. The Terraces and Memorial Hospice, for the loving care they provided Elvon towards the end.  There will be a celebration of life for Elvon on January 20, at 4:00 pm, at Fountaingrove Lodge in Santa Rosa.  RSVP to HelenMegan@aol.com, as The Lodge needs a count.  Donations may be made to CityTeam Ministries in Oakland, which was close to his heart, or the charity of your choice.

Elvon died last night.  For those who have not been following my blog, he had had Alzheimer’s for more than 10 years.  He faked it well for a long time, and we sailed all around the world, as much as possible.  He liked it, became familiar with cruise ships, and the crew were a big help.  A year ago June, we moved into Fountaingrove Lodge, a cruise ship that doesn’t leave the dock, where we both got help and support.  Thanks to Susan for doing the leg and paper work, which was considerable.

Elvon continued to decline, and went from a walker, to a wheelchair, in August.  He had become very fearful and it wasn’t always easy to get him to transfer, even to the chair.  The Lodge’s care-giving staff were wonderful, and I blessed the fact that we were here.

Then came the fires.  They started in Silverado, and Susan let me know around ten-thirty.  I could smell smoke in Santa Rosa.  When I turned on the TV, and found they were less than three miles away, I had to get us out of there.  Elvon would have been severely traumatized by the Lodge evacuation, and I couldn’t have waited until it happened, which was around three am, and was horrific, by all accounts.  We made it to a Holiday Inn in Fort Bragg, which worked well, until I smelled smoke from the Redwood fire and took the Scalbergs up on their kind offer of their house in Carmel.

It was perfect, only Elvon continued to lose ground.  He became more and more fearful of his transfers, until he would only get up for dinner, and that was a huge struggle.   About ten days before we could get back into the Lodge, he got up in the middle of the night, and used the commode as a walker. I woke up when he fell and broke his leg. That was almost two months ago.

He never recovered.  The Lodge survived, and I am back in our apartment.  There is much devastation very close, but our buildings are OK.  Elvon moved into the Memory Care unit here, with hospice.  He liked it, thanked us, and continued to thank his care givers.

His entire family, daughters Cathryn and Susan, Sister Esther, her husband Herb, and their daughter, Kris, visited the weekend before Christmas.  He was happy to see all of them, and it seemed to give him closure.  He barely said another word.  Last night, when I went to his room for movie night, I found him dead in his bed.  He must have gone peacefully, as there was plenty of staff on the floor.

We would have been 24 years married, tomorrow.  A better husband, no one ever had, and I miss him terribly.  But it’s good to know he is in a better place, with nothing to fear.  There will be a celebration of life in January, and we’ll publish the date when it has been established.

For our Christmas greeting this year, I have resorted to blatant plagiarism.  This is too good not to pass on.  It came from Flyers’ Rights, an organization I support in spirit and with $10 a month.  They are all there is between us and the airlines, who are doing all they can to make us give up on travel.  It looks like they plagiarized it, too.  Here it is:

With love in a very difficult year,

Elvon, Helen, and Sylly P, 117

Follow my blog by clicking on www.helenmegan.com and then on “follow” on the left. You can see what Flyers’ Rights does and offer your own support at http://www.flyersrights.org/  Get their newsletter by clicking in the second box.  It’s very good.

After writing that last blog on Friday morning, I went to see Elvon, and he was much better and speaking in sentences, at least until he got tired. He told me he likes The Terraces. That’s a relief.  Comcast is the current frazzler.  I spent an hour on the phone with them, on Friday, with no real result.  It’s sort of working but not with Comcast’s remote until after you jump through a few hoops on the TV’s remote.  .  With about 20 people needing to turn it on and off, this is not acceptable.  They are sending me a new remote, which I doubt will fix it.  Sigh.

Because I say Elvon is happier does not mean he is getting better.  But at least he is comfortable.  This last was a family weekend.  Cathryn had depositions to take in Arizona and used that  as a springboard to a family visit.  Elvon’s sister, Esther, in Fresno, decided she had to see him, too, and since none of them could come here for Christmas, we had the annual big family weekend.  I stepped back and let them all have at him. Elvon was talkative on Saturday, but unresponsive Sunday and Monday.  I had hoped for him to be well by Tuesday, but, alas, not.

Cat had to go home early Tuesday morning, to be with her husband, Matt, whose Crohn’s operation had failed and had to be re-done.  It’s a lot more complicated than that, but I don’t understand it enough to explain.  He’s still in the ICU, and worthy of thoughts and prayers, too.

Wednesday, Elvon was a little more awake, and I saw him, with our Hospice Social Worker, in the afternoon, and again after dinner to watch a movie.  I brought wine, but he can’t really drink it any more.  The acid makes him choke.  We held hands and watched Anastasia.  It turned out to be the cartoon version, but it suited our purposes.  I am going back tonight.  He seems to like our time together at the end of the day.  I do, too.

The new Comcast remote arrived, today, and it was an earlier version than the one we had.  I called them again, got more intelligent life on the end of the line, and we got it back to the way the original guy had installed, with the better remote.  I then gave up, and revised the instructions to back where they were.  At least it’s simpler.

I have been agonizing over our Christmas Greeting, and have now found one that works.  It will be my next post.

Elvon is happier in The Terraces.  24 hours in, he was even much more responsive.  He even spoke a full sentence.  I didn’t see another one in the two subsequent days, though.  He seems to be happier, and mouthed I love you, in response to an entirely different question, but I take it when I get it, and am grateful.  His room is lovely and has great energy.  The building is quiet, even though there is a lot going on, if only he could participate.

Yesterday, I spent three hours there, waiting for, and working with, Comcast.  He didn’t pay much attention, and wasn’t really watching it when I left.  I am hoping it’s company.  I’ll have a lot more work to do to get it set up with Amazon Prime and NetFlix, so we can watch movies together in the evenings.  All this technical stuff has become so hard.  The Comcast rep couldn’t even set it up such that it would power on right into Comcast.  He has it so you need both remotes and knowledge of the fact that Comcast is “Outside Antenna/TV” to get it going.  That’s just wrong.  There are probably 20 people who will be touching that set and I can’t get the word to all of them.  I’ll make a little sign, if I can’t get it to work as it should.  That’s for this afternoon.  I wanted to report to you, first, and thank all of you for your encouragement, both here on the blog, in private emails, phone calls, and in person.  It keeps me going, and, yes, times ARE tough. Love, Helen

I haven’t written, because there has been no change in Elvon’s condition, and he is still at Sonoma Post-Acute Care, but not for much longer.    No change is bad in this case. He is in a rehab facility and has shown zero interest in being rehabilitated.  I don’t blame him.  He has been through enough.  But there they are, feeding him mush, so he won’t get pneumonia, making him sit in a chair for hours, and trying to torture him with physical therapy.

All he has ever wanted was peace and quiet, good food, a little wine and a TV set to keep him company.  I can’t watch his unhappiness any longer.  I am bring him home to Fountaingrove, to The Terraces, our Memory Care Unit.  It’s beautiful, and serene.  Hospice will bring in the HiLo bed he requires, and offer support to all of us.  He’ll be allowed to enjoy whatever he wants to eat and drink.  Susan and I will be spending the rest of today decorating, getting the TV, etc.  He’ll come to his new home on Monday.  I’ll be able to walk over and see him whenever I want, so more short visits are in order.  I think he’ll like that.

Today, Susan and I are in the Interior Design business on his room.  We’ll put in a little Christmas, too, and we’re expecting the whole family next weekend.